Nun Myths Debunked: You Have to Be Perfect
Welcome to our third episode of …
Myth #3 — You have to be perfect to become a nun
“Oh, I could never be a Sister… I’m not good enough.”
“I am way too much of a sinner to be a nun.”
“Me? Are you kidding me? There’s no way they’d accept someone with a past like mine.”
This third “nun myth” is more than just a myth — it can actually be one of the devil’s insidious ways of blocking a religious vocation! Like many other misconceptions, it seems quite reasonable at first glance: the religious life, especially the cloistered contemplative life, is a high calling, and it would seem that only those who have reached a considerable degree of holiness should even be allowed to consider such a vocation.
If this were the case, however, then most (if not all!) nuns would never have entered the monastery! A calling to the religious life is a very special grace, but it is not at all based on the merit of the one who receives it. It is, rather, a totally gratuitous gift of God, a gift which we can do absolutely nothing to deserve. Women are not called to the cloister because they are exceptionally holy — they are called because God in His inscrutable mercy has chosen them. In fact, those who consider themselves “spiritually advanced” at the time they enter are in for a rude awakening! There is nothing like monastic life to show a person her own faults and failings, while at the same time teaching her a great trust in God’s love and forgiveness. And the conversion is ongoing — we will never reach total perfection until we enter our Heavenly homeland! Religious life is meant not as a “safe haven” for the perfect, but as a “training ground” for Heaven.
But what, some may ask, about those who have led lives of serious sin in the past? Have they disqualified themselves as potential brides of Christ? No sinner is beyond the reach of God’s mercy, and countless men and women throughout the ages have experienced deep conversions and become great Saints of the Church. Some of them (for instance, St. Ignatius Loyola) have also felt God’s call to consecrate their lives to Him. So a sinful past certainly does not disqualify a person from discerning religious life!
However, here we must make an important distinction. There are those who are currently struggling with habitual serious sin, and there are those who have done so in the past but are now living a virtuous life. For those who find themselves falling again and again, there is still some healing work that Christ must (and desires to!) do in their lives before considering a consecrated vocation. The simple reason is this: until a person is able to remain in the state of grace and live the ordinary Christian life of virtue — no small thing! — he or she does not have the strength necessary for the additional demands of religious life. When a person has, through God’s grace and their own good will, made a definitive break with serious sin and has shown an ability to consistently pursue a life of solid virtue, then he or she is at a point where discernment of a religious vocation is now a real possibility. A good rule of thumb to follow: if someone has been able to live in freedom from struggles such as serious sin, drug/alcohol abuse, or sexual struggles for two to three years, then his or her heart is likely free enough to begin exploring consecrated life.
Humility is the irreplaceable foundation-stone of a solid religious life — and that humility consists in large part of acknowledging our own weakness, sinfulness, and need for redemption. But when this is paired with an awareness of God’s infinite mercy, what can we do but love Him and give ourselves to Him more wholeheartedly each day?